SHAGRATH ELLESSAR

Love is something I always wanted all my life. But finding and getting it is a far difference. I thought someone in church love me. Someone who cared and was there when I’m lonely. Someone who didn’t want me to smoke, someone who would go so far as to be angry with me just to stop me from doing so.

Well, if that someone is reading this, I’ve already stopped smoking. So maybe we fought for no reason. Maybe I shouldn’t let you know in the first place. But I did. Recently I found someone that I thought I could be with forever. I said that I will marry her, I made my mother angry at me so I can get her to believe that my mother doesn’t care about me. She said that my mother will never hate me. I mean don’t all mothers love their child?

Then I realise that this girl wasn’t the one for me. I just felt that in my heart but I didn’t want to be lonely so I went on looking for another one. Soon I found someone who said “Love you” to me. First time a girl said that to me when I heard that I was so happy. But that joyful moment only last for a while. For she left me broken hearted. Broken hearted for the 4th time. IN MY LIFE, I ALWAYS WANTED LOVE!!! But it seemed so difficult to get it.

Because of that 4th time, it made me not believe in love anymore. And not anymore will I waste my time on this!!!!!